Friday, 13 November 2009

Open For Commissions

We have learnt from last year that this is the time we spread ourselves too thin. During November and December in 2008 we were definitely over enthusiastic in what we could achieve; signing up for numerous craft and Christmas fairs and accepting commissions and wholesale orders left right and centre. We were so busy last year that we were still sending out people’s Christmas presents after Christmas day… and we don’t plan to do that again.

We have decided not to participate in shows and events this holiday season and to concentrate our efforts on our online sales and commissions... we actually want to enjoy this holiday instead of passing out as soon as the heat is taken off!

So, I am offering my services to you! Anything your heart desires… be as wild and wonderful as you dare.

Please be aware of the final postage dates below and allow at least a week to craft your bespoke creature.

Final postage dates:

Australia and Rest of World 4th December
USA and Canada 10th December
Europe 11th December
UK 21st December

Wednesday, 9 September 2009

Whitby Goth Weekend in 50 days!

It must sound like the Goth weekend is the only real event in my calendar as I reckon about 50% of the blog entries I have made have been about it… and I can’t deny it’s a big one for me – especially as it’s at Halloween.

There is a fair amount of preparation for every event I take part in, but because I attend this one with a large group of mates I need to be as organised as possible to give myself the time to party while I’m there. My preparation for the Goth weekend starts earlier and earlier each year as we become more and more established and people expect to see us there. This requires that we take more creatures and become more ingenious with our designs as Halloween themes are popular and Whitby folk are starting to think about Christmas gifts.

I’m starting to panic! 8 weeks may sound like a long time but I assure you it is anything but. I have just made a list of everything I would like to achieve in that time and I am blown away by the length of it. Of course I have a good stock here, created for the events I have attended this summer, but I’m sure you can appreciate that the creatures I take to family fairs in sunny parks are a whole different kettle of fish to the darker variety that is swooned over at the Goth festival.

I am torn between creating the staples of the store; the creatures I know are popular, and the new ideas I have swimming round in my head, as yet untried and very much still in the design process. I have ideas about a new look for our stall, based around an old Victorian curiosity shop but I am worried that I won’t be able to give it the time it needs to make it look authentic, and of course there are the Halloween costumes to think up and make!

There is nothing for it but to buckle down to work and get creative.

The countdown to Whitby has officially started: 50 days to go!

A note about Whitby Goth Weekend: Many of the regulars will know that there have been some changes to the organization of the Goth festival over the last few months. I want to assure you that everything you come to expect from the Goth weekend is still happening and your festival enjoyment will not be affected by any management changes (most of the rumours incidentally are just that…rumours). There is of course the main Spa event with bands such as Faith and the Muse and Eden House, but there is also Carnival Macabre, Nostalgia, a Halloween costumes ball, club nights and bands at venues all around town, a custom car and bike show and events for under 18’s, not to mention the extensive gothic markets, where you’ll find us at the Leisure centre. So don’t believe anyone when they say part of the event has been cancelled and go find out for yourself.

Sunday, 6 September 2009

I had a dream last night... might even be prophesy.

I was walking across the moors. The sun was trying to shine but there was a thick blanket of cloud stopping the rays reaching me. There was a strong wind blowing against me and whipping my hair about my face. I was heading to the site (site for what I can’t quite remember) and I had a plunger and a bag of smarties that I’d meticulously picked out all the blue ones from.

As I walked I whistled. It was a tune that I knew I had to sing at this point in the journey. I had that creepy feeling that something was watching me but there was nowhere anyone could be hiding; the land was flat and there were no buildings for miles.

The tree came into view; the marker that I had reached my destination. As I got closer the ground got crisper. Each footstep sounded like I was crushing eggshells; the grass and shrubs were like really fine glass that broke into tiny shards beneath my feet. At the base of the tree was a small pool - the entrance. I launched myself toward the pool, threw in the smarties, covered the pool with the plunger and started thrashing it with all my might.

… and then I woke up.

So what does it mean?

Well, I think I can safely say that the creatures are sock horrors and the pool is their wormhole from The Doldrums, but smarties are a new development. I wonder what havoc they wreak. And the ground turning to glass in the area around the portal?… well that’s new too.

Tuesday, 28 July 2009

Thank chuff for Lemsip

The last couple of days I've woken up with the threat of a cold lurking in the background; perpetually tired, a sore throat and that 'heat' in my sinuses. Yesterday I spent the whole day sneezing but I thought it was because I'd been having a much needed clearout and had dislodged loads of dust. As it turns out a cold has come into full force today. There was no way I was dragging my sore tired bones out of bed at the usual time this morning and my head feels like it's clamped in a vice as is squeezes out every last, well, there's no need to go there! The only respite is the miracle of Lemsip every 4 hours

...and all the while, in the back of my head, I have that niggling thought "is it swine flu?" I know it isn't - I don't have a cough, my body doesn't ache like flu, I don't "feel" sick but I'm waiting...

... and while I wait, my lack of attention to my work (and an excuse that I can't make creatures lest I contaminate them with some infectious germ) brought me to wander the pages of Etsy and I foumd these little gems:

Dragon Particulare respirator by Tom Banwell

So I'll sit here, sipping my elixir and muster up the energy to get a wriggle on and get to work!

Tuesday, 14 July 2009

Starhouse - new stockists of Sock Horror

Starhouse is a fantastic new store owned by the creators of Starhouse Clothing in the heart of York. This unique shop is the newest store to offer Sock Horrors.

Julie and Kelly, the owners, have expanded their Starhouse clothing name by opening up this brilliant store in this historic Viking town. They’ve only been open in York a matter of weeks but are already building on their experience in Hull and have established themselves among the alternative scene.

Kelly and Julie’s first incarnation of Starhouse clothing opening in Hull in 2004 providing the city with affordable alternative clothing catering for all the different faces of the alternative market. They strive to be different from other Goth/alternative stores by constantly searching out new suppliers and smaller companies that will give them a lot of exclusives and one-offs. In addition to the usual brands they also customise a lot of their own clothes for sale in their shop. Amongst their wares you’ll find a collection of malicious Sock Horrors, Fluff Creatures and copies of our Sockmosis survival manuals. You can also commission a custom Sock Horror through them.

If you live near York, or just fancy a day out, I recommend you pay a visit to Starhouse. You’ll find them on Stonegate, one of the old streets that lead to the Minster.

I love wandering the cobbled shambles of the old town with the narrow twisting streets and the buildings that jut out to almost meet over the heads of shoppers.

There is just so much history seeping out of every crevice. York also has some of the most stupid laws that have just not been rescinded since ancient times:

You can legally shoot a Scotsman who is within the city walls, so long as you are stood on the city walls, you are using a bow and arrow and it is a Sunday… and even then you are only allowed to kill one per Sunday!


On Whip-ma-whop-ma gate (the shortest street (15m) with the longest name) you can legally flog your wife for being drunk… though of course this doesn’t happen any more.
Just thinking about the city makes me want to go back there.

In fact, as soon as I’ve posted this blog I’m going to plan a trip.

Thursday, 9 July 2009

I’m a girl of extremes… all or nothing.

I latch on to a project; whether it is creating new creatures, throwing myself at a new profile or collaborating on a new volume of Sockmosis. I go for it hammer and tongs until I get to a place where I can say ‘my work here is done’ and then I move on. It’s not the best way of working. I become engrossed in that one task at the expense of everything else.

Recently my attention has been absorbed firstly by creating costumes for the fancy dress party a couple of weeks ago (the theme was Heroes and Villains; I was Audrey II from the Little Shop of Horrors and my fella was Optimus Prime)

With the Hitcher for those of you that know 'The Mighty Boosh'

Can you tell which one is the cardboard cut out?

...and this last week I was getting tribal garb together for our troupes performance last Friday.

I’m glad to say that both events were a huge success.

So I’ve been madly busy of late, yet I realise that my presence online has been neglected and Sock Horror has suffered. I came here today to find that my last blog entry was a competition launch… well, I’m sad to say I forgot about that! Didn’t promote it or nurture it at all, so I’m doubly shocked that I did actually receive some entries.

I’d like to thank those of you that participated and apologise for taking my eye off the ball. I promise to give you my full attention next time I launch a competition… watch this space because there’s another one on its way.

So, without further ado, I’d like to announce that the winner of the competition was Trey Rain who suggested that these adorable little creatures are Scouts of the Doldrums, sent ahead of the raiding party to scope out fresh supplies of socks and map out possible dangers. Well done Trey!

Thursday, 11 June 2009

Competition: name the breed and discover its role in the Doldrums

There is a new creature currently under investigation on my workbench.

It was discovered on Sunday the 7th of June hopping around the water outlet in the garden. It's a wriggler; doesn't stop moving and doesn't fear humans as the other breeds do. It's also a lot smaller and can fit into crevices other Sock Horrors cannot.

This creature has never been seen before, however since it's discovery there has been an explosion in numbers.

There is much study and extensive exploration to continue before these creatures can be presented to you in the Sock Horror Mausoleum, but I expect that they will be a prolific breed and will spread themselves far and wide.

I would like you to be the investigators of this strain of Sock Horror. It is up to you to name these creatures and to determine their role in the Doldrums. All entries into the competition will receive a 10% discount at the Sock Horror Mausoleum and the winner will also receive the first creature of its kind and a certificate of discovery.

Further information on the breeds and roles of the other creatures from the Doldrums can be found in their listing descriptions.

Please send your entries to before Sunday 28th of June. The winner will be announced on Wednesday the 1st of July.

Wednesday, 27 May 2009

Tattoos, Tantrums and Tinkers


Sunday saw us at the first annual Hull Ink tattoo convention. Having never taken Sock Horror to such an event before (though I have been an enthusiast at such events over the years) I was a little apprehensive; will people get it? Or will I be met with a lot of blank expressions and confused mutterings? I'm like this with each new venue type I take them too.

On the whole though, I am glad to say, that Sock Horror was greeted with the scary excitement and enthusiasm it invokes at other events. We were inundated with questions and musings and saw the light bulb moment for several people... yes these are the critters that steal your socks! In fact I was extracting more ridicule for my corset with it's bullet hole and my 5" stack boots than with the motley crew of maleficient doldrites ranked behind me.

Unfortunately I didn't get to see much of the rest of the event, but I did hear some great bands and I did see some awesome ink work being done on the day. It definitely woke the desire in me for some new ink and got the juices flowing with ideas.


Because we enjoyed the day so much I looked into participating at other tattoo events as soon as I got home. There are some huge tattoo events that take place up and down the country, and I thought this would be the best of both worlds... to go to some conventions slightly further a field that I wouldn't usually get to and to take the Horrors to a new audience.

Well, it ended in a tantrum (not pretty I know) becasue we're either away, hubby can't book the time off work, clashes with another event we're already going to, is too close to organise for or is already booked up. In short, I'm too late to do tattoo conventions this year! but you can bet I'm going to be first in the queue with my booking form for next years events.

Which brings me to Tinkers

With out major events out of the way and our newest stockists supplied (this constitutes a blog of it's own) I can now put my attention into our online affairs. I spent my bank holiday Monday updating our website and listing all out current creatures.

Etsy is being updated through the coming week, and I plan to catch up with my friends on MySpace and in the Etsy Dark Side Team. It's been too long!

Thursday, 21 May 2009

I used to spend hours playing space invaders... who didn't?

I used to get beside myself with excitement as the lines of aliens advanced on me... ME... and I frantically tried to shoot them down. I was hopeless; too gripped by fear to be any good, but I did love the rush and anxiety I got. I've never been able to play computer games since.

But these, these are amazing: space invaders soap set from Digital Soaps on Etsy

I'm lost for words. I really don't know what to say; other than I can now beat the space invaders into submission!

They're ace! Well done Digital Soaps.

Wednesday, 20 May 2009

Wired eyes

I'm tired today.

For the last 2 days my eyes have been heavy; glazed over and drifting into daydreams easily... a sure sign that I should get more sleep. I feel like I need a pick-me-up but in reality I probably need a good nights rest.

Funny then that I should come across these catnip eyeballs on Etsy by hannaPt.

They are so alive and awake that I am jealous of their vitality, and the fact that they are laced with catnip is so ironic to how I feel right now.

I'm going to get some for my cat, Moebe, but she better watch out or I'll claim them for my own...catnip is suddenly appealing!

Tuesday, 19 May 2009

I've seen you looking!

I know that from time to time you browse the walls of the Sock Horror Mausoleum to gawp at the creatures we have on display there.

I know that you check in on MySpace or other social account and find that nothing much is going on there.

I assure you that that is not because I can't be bothered... rather that I stretch myself too thin.

You may have noticed that I do not present very many new creatures to you. This is down to your passion. Rarely do i get chance to catalogue ans list a new creature before it is re-housed, hence the scarce trapping on our website and Etsy stores.

In truth I have a collection of over 60 creatures currently staring down at me ready for the tattoo convention we are going to on Sunday, and I promise that the first thing I will do on my return is upload all the Horrors and Warding charms for you to see.

Similarly I will try hard to check in on all the profiles we have online... and we have a lot. This means that instead of reaching loads of new people, we are in fact ignoring the majority. MySpace for instance is a great site, but this year I have done little more that answer direct questions. I shamefully haven't said hello to any of our new friends.

It's not good enough!

So, I will be concentrating my efforts on a few select sites. You will find me on the following:

Website MySpace Twitter Blogspot Etsy

I will also keep an eye on Zazzle and Lulu though I will not hang out there, and I hope that this means I have more time to dedicate to the Etsy Dark Side Team that I love.

If you are friends through one of our other sites, please don't worry, we won't be closing our accounts but you will be directed to one of the above.

So, I hope to meet you soon online,


Madame Horror

Saturday, 9 May 2009

May madness

It was so hard to drag my lazy bones out of bed this morning, but I did it… for you. No, that’s a lie. I had to get up at an ungodly hour to take my hubby to work as his bike is in bits in the garage. It seems to be in pieces more than it is whole… he just loves to tinker.

It was good I was up so early as I had a list of jobs to do in town; parcels to take to the post office, cheques to take to the bank and several other errands to run. My last stop is Chilli Lime deli where I have a coffee with my mate and pick up my organic veg box. It was crazy today though. Every time we stood by the door to get some sun/ air another customer came in. No rest for the wicked. But then all hell broke loose as the salon at the end had a burst pipe and water was gushing everywhere. Taff being the gent that he is ran to their aid leaving me to look after his shop. Now I like food, but my knowledge is limited when it comes to helping others work out what they will like. Which of these oils are better for dipping? Rape seed or olive oil, lemon or walnut? Which passata is best for use with Borlotti beans? I just hope I haven’t given any bad advice and turned some of his customers away. I had fun though. It was good to see that everyone is in chaos and it’s not just me.

So the chaotic run up to Whitby, the whirlwind festival and the frantic restock of our vendors has been managed and we can now turn our attention to the next series of events.

Our good friends at Chilli Lime Deli are once again hosting their ‘Chilli cook-off’ heats, the first of which is on the 16th May. Come down to Fleming square in Blackburn and for a small donation to charity taste the participants’ entries and vote for your favourite chilli. There will be other entertainment as well as the Sock Horror road show.

Also this month we have Hull Ink on the 24th of May. This promises to be an excellent event with 34 tattoo artists from the UK and Europe, tattoo competitions, bands and of course the market where you will find us nestled among your favourite stalls.

So, I’d better get my arse in gear. I have Horror skins to stuff and body bags to make.

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

Home once again

Well Whitby Goth Weekend was very different for us this year. I'm sure I've mentioned that there is usually a group of 12 of us that make the trip to the festival twice a year and that between trading all day and partying all night for 4 days we're beyond tired when we get back and need a week off to recover.

This time was the total opposite. There were only 4 of us made it to the festival as all our friends decided to save their pennies for the Halloween event instead; me and my husband and my sister and her husband, who were also trading Bride and Gloom, so for a start we were in a cute 4 person cottage rather than a 12 person mansion.

We did our thing through the days. Met loads of Goths in fantastic attire and pimped our wares to all who would stop and look. After trading all day we were able to leisurely wander back to the cottage via a pub (to rest our weary feet) and sit and relax a bit before thinking about getting some food. We could chose a restaurant at ease, take time over our meal and then see what the evening held for us... which in truth was a series of chilled nights - a few beers in comfort.

This is a major contrast to our usual whirlwind of covering the stall, running back to the cottage, throwing some food down our necks while trying to glam up and then racing out to get to the venue and catch up with our mates. This then leads to a second wind and staying up will 3 or 4 am. Not a good start for a second or third day of work.

So while we have enjoyed ourselves we have also managed to recharge the batteries and I can now start thinking about the wholesale orders I have to meet and the tattoo festival I am trading at in Hull at the end of May and it doesn't feel like an uphill struggle.

On a different note, while we were in Whitby an interview I did with Fresh peaches was published. Please take time to have a look: Sock Horror Interview

Thursday, 23 April 2009

Whitby Madness

We're off to Whitby Goth Festival tomorrow and I can't wait. I have been running round for days trying to get organised, trying to remember all the little jobs and striving to get everything ready without any traumas but I think we are finally there... there is a mountain of boxes lined up along the dining room wall. All the creatures, books and warding charms catalogued, categorized and packed ready for transportation. All the literature printed, all my emails answered, all my tasks completed (or deligated). I have worked out what I'm wearing for the next 5 days, dyed my hair (and nails and neck and bathroom floor) and packed my crimpers. I think I have everything I need for a thoroughly Gothic weekend.

So, I'm afraid to say that it's unlikely you're going to be able to catch me for the next few days as I am going to be without my internet connection, unless of course you are in Whitby - in which case you will find me in the Whitby leisure centre on east cliffe on Friday, Saturday and Sunday surrounded by a whole plethora of malicious creatures, survival manuals and warding charms. If you are at the festival please do drop by and say hi.

For those of you that are not able to join us in the home of Bram Stokers Dracula you will be able to keep abreast of our antics on Twitter.

Sunday, 19 April 2009

So, we leave for Whitby Goth Weekend in 4 days and as usual I'm frantically trying to get my stock together. It seems that no matter how well I plan, or how far in advance I start, I get to the point where I have to throw a couple of all nighters to get everything finished.

I did think I was on top of everything this year, but just when I feel like I'm getting ahead I get another wholesale request (Japonica last week) and this week I've had 2 other wholesale orders to fullfil from PAD gallery and Hex Piercing studio. I really can't complain. It just means that all the stock I've been building in prep for the Whitby Goth Weekend has just sailed out the window.

I'm now looking at the remaining pile of Horrors and wondering whether I have enough or whether I'm going to find myself sewing in the van on the journey to Whitby... again!

And as if that isn't enough, my sister has taken a stall this year. She is trading under the name of Bride and Gloom. She booked her pitch within weeks of opening her own sewing rooms. The good news for her is that she's been absolutely snowed under with work and has had to take on 2 staff just to cover her everyday work. The bad news is that she hasn't had a free minute to get stock together for her Whitby stall and so I've been giving her every spare minute I can to help her out.

So now... do I crack on with my own Sock Horror stock or do I think I have enough together to help my sister?

It's not all doom and gloom though, the Sock Horror stall has some exciting new items for you this year. We are aware that some of you are now in constant fear that you will become victims of their crimes. We can sympathise with the desperation and anger that these creatures intill; that they can travel freely around your homes is a scary thing. Therefore we have paid particular attention to our warding charms;
pin badges and buttons,

specially preserved doldrite eyes as clips and rings,

greeting cards
and magnetic bookmarks

all on offer to help you out in times of need.

Tuesday, 14 April 2009

I wasn't able to do it...

but I did try; to gorge myself on chocolate till I was sick!

But as I wasn't successful in this task (better luck next time) I threw myself into my second assignment and this time I succeeded. It was teh introduction of Sock Horror into Japonica, a brilliant florist come gift shop in Fleming Square, Blackburn.

Sock Horrors new reside alongside unusual and exotic bouquets and inspiring artworks from other local craftsmen and women in a quirky boutique on a historic street close the Blackburn Cathedral.

I have spent quite a while perusing the wares in Japonica, purchased a few gifts (which will probably never make it to their intended recipient) and still seem only to have seen probably half of the items offered. I warn you, be prepared to lose yourself in there.

At Japonica, like all Sock Horror venues, you may also order fully customised creatures.

Thursday, 26 March 2009


And here he is; the celestial being. I have named him Sorip.

Just look at how the big pink planet sits on his belly and curves round the base of his horns; how the earth wraps round his horns and slides under his arse (was that intentional?) and the stars are firing from his finger tips. There's even an orange rocket or two.

I can't believe I dilly dallied with this one. I just love him! I'm not sure I'm going to be able to part with him. For now he is sat on the shelf above my computer throwing starry shapes around my head.

Talking about creatures form outer space I just love the Brain Bloom by Doodlemonkie.

I hope I never meet one in real life!

Friday, 20 March 2009

Celestial socks and no incision

There is a pair of socks that I love. I've had them for quite a while and so far all I've managed to do is look at them!

Usually when I fall for a pair of socks I instantly know what I'm going to do with them and I have to do it there and then... the design generally shouts out for a particular shape or a patch of pattern for a specific location, but not this time.

I bought them from an independent retailer in Preston. A little shop that doesn't usually sell socks, but on this occasion made my heart soar as I found the most amazing socks with planets and rockets on them. I have gazed into their weave pondering their fate on numerous occasions and so far been unable to make the first cut. For some reason, with this particulat pair of socks, I am hesitant to jump in and see what happens as I would do with all other socks. What if I don't like the end result? what if I spoil them?

It's stupid I know, but I love them too much to waste them and have no way to replace them if the worst should happen.

I think I just need to force myself to pick up the scissors and make the first incision...

Yikes! Done! Holy smokes!

Well the hard bit's over; I just have to make the darn things now :)

I'll let you know how it goes...

Wednesday, 18 March 2009

Another feature... Thanks Chickendog

I stumbled across this blog via my good friend Doodlemonkie yesterday. I was immediately caught by the ensamble I found there as I had covetted every article featured in the blog at some point, so I stopped and decided to follow Chickendog's musings, knowing that with tastes that overlap so much I would learn about many new and exciting things.

How bizarre that the very next post to filter through from Chickendog was SOCK HORROR :)

Check it out:

And take a gander at her etsy store. I can't stop grinning... chickendogs... yay!

Tuesday, 17 March 2009

Double whammy... feature and new dilemma

Have you heard of Chataeu Bizarre? I hadn't until today, and I can't help but wonder why that is? I spend so much time on the computer you would think it only natural that I venture up the road to the chataeu gates and wander the hallways of the castle, and as I do so now I see that we have tread the same pathways on many occassions and yet I've been oblivious!

It's a wonderful site. You should take the time to visit;

hardcore glamour & curious finds, reviewed daily

And that's what brought me to their keep... Sock Horror have been featured on their website. It's quite a privelage to be ranked amoung some of my favourite artists and stores.

I'm actually finding it quite hard to drag myself away from the lure of the many new curios.

Monday, 9 March 2009

It's better to burn than fade away.

Recently I have been savouring the relaxed pace of the Sock Horror happenings, knowing that all too soon the pace will pick up and once again I'll struggle to find time to stroke the cat.

When everything is going crazy, my husbands' favourite saying is: "it's better to burn than fade away". I'm not sure who said that originally, but I just love the way Suzannaanna has used this saying in one of her wonderful 'Rock Blox artworks.

So to emphasis that, this morning I found a new vigour. One that I thought I'd lost if truth be told. But here I am; creating, hunting, making, learning and presenting.

Today's project: Sock Horror Page Markers.

These little gadgets are fantastic... if I do say so myself.

These magnetic page markers are storng enough to clamp a page or two in your book, but not so strong as to tear or mark the leaves. Never again will your bookmark fall out or you lose your place.

They are available in sets of 2 or 4 from either the Sock Horror Website or Etsy Store.

Wednesday, 25 February 2009

My gingerbread distraction

I love blogging, but I am easily distracted.

I turn up here, perhaps not every day, but more often than not, with the intention of pouring some of the thoughts cluttering up my head out onto my keyboard. I may even have an idea of what I want to rave about, but once I’ve logged in I am presented with the entries of the blogs I am following… so I read a few, mull them over, follow their links, understand their motivations. I may also notice an interesting link or follower on their page and click through the entries, one after the next. This might sound like a dedicated approach, but in reality it’s quite frenzied, flitting from one page to the next and probably missing loads of interesting stuff.

In some ways I feel like Gretel (Hansel must have wandered off on his own) drifting off into the woods and finding a house made of gingerbread; where I just have to stay and sample the confectionary. I learn loads; see all kinds of interesting items and articles, meet some inspirational people and definitely find ways to frivol away the pennies. The sad thing is that I never manage to follow the breadcrumbs back to the beginning to write what I came here to write.

So I guess, that makes every one of you that catches my attention and reveals a part of yourself, a treat/trap from the wicked witch. But don’t worry; I have no intention of burning you in the oven… I love your candies too much.

Well, here is today's gingerbread; The Gate Ring but Idle Hands Designs

And here is my offering: Harlie the Seeker

Friday, 16 January 2009

New Tactics

Devious, conniving, tricksy doldrites!

Did anyone see the news article about the mysterious appearance of thousands of shoes on a highway in Florida?

The authorities are baffled by their spontaneous appearance and seemingly no-one can work out where they have come from… well they haven’t asked the SHIT (Sock Horror Investigation Team).

It is obvious to us, with our world leading expertise, that this is the work of Doldrites! Let me explain what is happening. Up until now doldrite activity has revolved around the acquisition of socks that lie abandoned and forgotten, or are filched from our drawers and laundry when we are otherwise occupied. In other words, they have gone behind out backs and stayed out of sight.

This new tactic is altogether more daring and all too desperate. It appears they are in fact stealing socks from peoples’ feet (primarily while they are sleeping), but in the haste to make their escape they are not bothering to separate the socks from the shoes and are transporting the whole bundle back to the Doldrums. Over a period of time they have accumulated a surprising number of shoes, which they have pushed through a wormhole that just happened to open up on that stretch of the Florida highway.

We all know that they strive to free all sock kind, and regularly amaze us with the lengths they will go to when sourcing new initiates and to secure a way home. But the latest scheme is worrying for several reasons:

They are getting less secretive – they appear not to be worried about us finding out about them OR perhaps they think us too dumb to work this out

Their approaches are getting more invasive – stealing from our feet! Perhaps you have woken up yourself, perhaps after a night out, and not remembered taking your shoes and socks off?

Their efforts are accelerating – This is a relatively new technique and already they have amassed over 4000 shoes in this one tip.

Perhaps they are larger and more organised than we anticipated… I don’t want to think about that one!

All I can say is… be vigilant, stay safe and BEWARE YOUR SOCKS!
Madame Horror

Saturday, 10 January 2009

Secret Santa

Some of you may be aware that Sock Horror was born Christmas 2006 in a bid to come up with novel Secret Santa gifts for my friends. Well the deal has come full circle. This year, the Secret Santa I recieved from one of my friends was a Sock Horror Trap!

It's truly amazing; the amount of thought and research that has gone in to this contraption is impressive. The mechanism, which is fully functional, is devised from a standard mouse trap and a fangled coat hanger that holds up the trap door until the spring has sprung. And it si lethal; I have caught myself with it several times while playing with it!

It is baited with a seemingly harmless mix of loose wool and discarded sleepers... and there is a solitary key to entice even the most wary doldrites into it's confines. My friend has definitely done his homework; even to the point of ensuring that a marauding doldrite would be able to fit into the apparatus with ease.

I think you can say I'm well chuffed, and that this is the prototype of traps to come!

But it doesn't end there... another gift from the same friends was the following bronze plaque:

Don't ask me how they found such a truly apt plate but I'm glad they did. Cheers guys!

Thursday, 1 January 2009

Happy New Year!

Well, 2009 has offically begun!

Determined to get the year off to the right kind of start I have thrown myself at my work with the gusto of one that may not live to see another day. Slowly clearing out the mass of paperwork I've allowed to grow through 2008, working out where my efforts should focus in the begining of the year and listing the few remaining creatures I have left after the Christmas period on my website...which are also starting to filter onto Etsy:

And after the abuse I have put myself through this past week (chocolates, very little exercise, more chocolates, party food and very little sleep) I was very pleased when I came across this much needed cleansing soap by Bunny Butt Apothecary

I need to take more care of myself.